The Reddy Cab Company

The Reddy Cab Company
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Monday, March 23, 2020

The Great TP Crisis of 2020


Toilet paper? Seriously? That’s what you’re hoarding for the apocalypse? I’m surrounded by morons.

So, the wife and I went to Walmart a few days ago on our weekly shopping trip and found tons of empty shelves. Unbelievable! By dropping in at HEB and then hitting the dollar stores, we managed to secure most everything on our list. Except for toilet paper. Again, seriously?

Now, let me back up a bit and remind you that I live in a fairly small community in a county with ZERO confirmed cases of the virus (and I honestly do pray that it remains so, although I strongly suspect that we will eventually see it reach closer to home).

But (or should I say Butt?), returning to the toilet paper situation. It may sound gross or inconvenient, but there are other ways of accomplishing that particular task. And since I already know how to wash my hands properly, even if I made a mess, I think I could survive. I guess what I’m saying is that toilet paper doesn’t seem to qualify (to me) as an absolutely essential item. It doesn’t make the top of my list anyway.

But thanks to the media and their insistence on ramping up the panic, people are losing their minds! I’ve seen enough videos online to convince me of that. Actual fights over toilet paper in stores? Crazy! Lines outside of stores with people waiting for hours to buy the stuff before the store runs out in the first few minutes they’re open? Insane! And don’t even get me started on the price gouging for bottled water and hand sanitizer. And of course, toilet paper.

And why? Because the media has convinced us that we’re all going to end up being quarantined in our homes for weeks or more. So, stock up, right? Screw your friends and neighbors who need to eat tomorrow.  Or wipe their butts. More important for you to have a fully stocked storm cellar and enough toilet paper to last half-way through the next century. Sadly, that appears to be the mindset of way too many people.

I guess what astounds me the most is the apparent priorities of the hoarders. What about non-perishables? Actual food items? If I really do get quarantined, I hope I don’t end up sharing a fallout shelter with these idiots! Guess we’d be eating paper products and washing it down with Ozarka and Dasani. I repeat – I’m surrounded by morons!

(On a serious note, pray for our country and our leaders. This goes beyond politics, or it should. Pray for those around the world who are suffering. We can worry about who to blame later, if that’s what you think is important, but for now, let’s just pray and help one another get through these trying times.)

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